Fear shapes our limits

I’ve read somewhere that we are born with only two fears…the fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. All other fears are learned.

And what that means to me is, if you can learn a fear, you can unlearn a fear as well.

I think the first step in that is to uncover your fears. In what ways does fear show up in your life?

What is fear? I like the acronym version: FEAR…False Evidence Appearing Real…

Don’t get me wrong, fear is a useful device. It’s part of our survival mechanism where we are able to image a future event, war-game it in our minds…imagining the worse-case scenarios, experiencing that awful sensation of fear in the present as if the event is happening now so that we can motivate ourselves to take some action in the present that will prevent the worst-case scenario from happening.

The thing is though, the experience of fear can be so powerful that it stops us dead in our tracks. And instead of using fear as it is meant to be used…as a warning sign to get ourselves in the best, most resourceful state, so that we can do what we need to do to be prepared to handle or avoid the worst-case scenario. Instead, we have a tendency to use fear as a stop sign and do nothing, take no action toward the future event.

For example, let’s say you have a big presentation coming up in a few weeks’ time, but you hate speaking in front of groups…especially large groups. Immediately, your fear factor kicks in and you start to feel anxious and nervous just thinking about having to stand up in front of all those people.

What’s happening here is you’re imagining the worst-case scenario and your body is reacting as if it’s actually happening now, when in fact, it’s all in your mind.

The good news is, you can change the pattern by imaging how you want it to turn. Imagine the best-case scenario and watch your body respond as if the best-case scenario is happening now in the present. 

The BIG secret here is that both scenarios are happening in your imagination. The events are not yet real because they haven’t happened yet, bid our bodies are responding as if the event happening in the present moment.

As it is happening in your imagination, you can control the narrative and focus on the best-case scenario – what will you see, what will you hear, what will you feel. Harness the positive vibes and use them to focus on getting yourself prepared.

Focus on what you want, not what you don’t want. Use your imagination as a force for good.

Acknowledge the worst-case scenario, but don’t dwell on it. See it for what it is…a warning sign…warning you to take the necessary action to make sure the worst-case scenario doesn’t happen and if does, that you have a contingency plan to deal with it. 

Now refocus on the outcome you do want to happen and then do the necessary work to make sure you are positioned to get the best result you can.