My mother belongs to the fear I was needing, interlocking arms with white bags. Today has everything I need – wet clothes, pillowcases, liquor, eyelashes, and chemicals. Excuse the scars. Ducking, jumping, terrible things I was mid-air like a heavy meal. You save people too scared to fall from the sky. I need them to fall to feel better. I wept twice. My favourite emotion, a mix of happiness and sadness. No visible shame just a panicked indifference.
“The most important thing in life is not happiness but meaning.”
— John M. Hull, Notes on Blindness
Fun. I like the word fun. Who’s having fun today? Are you having fun today? Do you have enough fun in your life or could you use a little more? I could use a little more…just a little. Everybody is acting so serious. Who around you is having fun right now? Is it you? If not, why not have some fun.
Perhaps it’s the Puritan in us – an idle mind is the devil’s workshop, and all of that. We feel guilty if we’re having too much fun, unless we’re on our “own” non-work time or on holiday, then you’re expected to have fun.
Have you ever considered the long-term effects of vice-versa? Especially if you live your life from the outside in. I have a couple of projects i want to kick off today, one of which is to visit and rate all of the non-chain cafe and coffee houses in Leamington Spa. I’m currently writing this from Fat Birds Cafe. It’s a family owned joint on the main drag. I’ve been here before, but they didn’t Wifi and a brother can’t be dealing with a cafe with no WiFi. Good WiFi is an expected part of our culture nowadays.
The only reason I’m here is I had it on good authority that the caf now has good WiFi (and they do). The coffee is ok. The cakes are nice (i had the coffee, carmel, and pecan cake). The atmosphere is decent, it’s well lit and plenty of space upstairs and downstairs. I do have to make this one complaint though (and this goes for probably all independent coffee shops) and that is the price of the coffee in comparison to the “evil empire” chain joints. Fat Birds only have one size coffee on offer and it’s £2.35 a pop. If I was bringing someone here for a meeting, fine. But for a working session, it’s not good when I can go across the street to the ‘Bucks and pay £1.35 for a black filter coffee and get free refills for as long as i’m on the premises. The economics are in favour the ‘Bucks.
The other project I’m starting today is a snapshot project. I’m using an app called Reporter to randomly ping me through out the day. When I get the ping, I’ll take a snapshot of whatever is around me at the time. So far:
I think I’ll follow Roberto Bazlen’s lead: “I think it’s no longer possible to write books,” he wrote in one of his notebooks. “That’s why I don’t write books. Almost all books are footnotes, inflated into volumes. I write only footnotes.” And me, I write only fragmented blog post entries and the occasional scrap of verse. Sometimes I curate my favourite scraps and collate them into (e)book form and pimped them on Amazon. (Link to poetry book). In fact, I’m in the process of collating a new book together now.
“The danger of overstimulation and external voices will erode one’s core and necessitate the natural desire to compare and copy, which leads to living life from an “outside-in” point of view. I believe your lifestyle can never reproduce the joy and satisfaction that is associated with the opposite.”
Dr. Flo Falayi dropped this on Forbes today the idea that we’re born to stand out, especially if you want to be a leader in any capacity. However, I’ve found that between all the noise and self-absorption, it’s hard to stand out. Throw on top of that, the natural urge to blend in with everyone else, from the way you dress to the way you talk, and you have the perfect recipe for mediocrity. I agree with Dorie Clark:
…standing out is no longer optional, and for anyone to make a name for themselves, create true job security and make a difference in the world, they will have to share their unique perspective and inspire others to take action.
Inspiring people to action is key. Look at what Greta Thunberg has done. Whether you agree with her views or not, she’s moved folks to action on both sides of the argument, including the richest man in Europe and this guy:
She seems like a very happy young girl looking forward to a bright and wonderful future. So nice to see! https://t.co/1tQG6QcVKO
The first hurdle anyone has to overcome is the self-limiting beliefs that you are like everyone. This is untrue and damaging, as it renders one powerless to step out and stand out.
To stand out you have to tap into the desires, habits, and activities that make you happy, or what scientists, Todd Rose, and Ogi Ogas, call micro-motives. This is all a part of discovering the core values, stories, interpretations, and idea that make you uniquely you. Everyone can stand out because everyone has micro-motives.
Some clarifying questions to help you discover the you that is you:
Which influences shaped you early in life?
If you could change anything in your past, what would you change?
What types of issues get your attention?
Which issues energize you?
What would you do today if money or time weren’t an issue?
My big take-away from Dr. Falayi’s article is this:
You have to know who you are before you can stand out and lead others to do great things.
I felt a bit scrappy this morning along with an incredible urge to walk around naked. There must have been something in my coffee to trigger a primal reaction.
Having watched Hamilton over the weekend, I now have the soundtrack on repeat in Spotify. Particularly the lead track Alexander Hamilton, also My Shot, Ten Duel Commandments, and Non-stop. I admire people like Hamilton – people who are driven to a fault. They know what they want and are willing to move heaven and earth to get it.
Me, I’m way too laid back for that. I’m more of the Jimmy Buffet type in Margaritaville wearing my flip-flops and strumming my six-string.
Years ago I stumbled across this statement and question: It’s your life, what are you going to do with? Today, I contemplated this. I’m only a few weeks away from my birthday and I was wondering what am I going to do with the rest of my life?
I had the good fortune to witness this sunset tonight:
Excited to have as my guest host, Victoria James, founder of Mindflowers, in the studio with us to talk about self-importance and how mastering it will boost your authentic happiness by a factor of 10.
I’m slowing beginning to re-emerge from my wounded cocoon. Mobility in my right hand is edging along nicely, range of motion increasing each day since my release from the day ward.
Of course I want to charge ahead like a mad bull, but I’ve purposefully kept the breaks on to allow this old body time to heal. The 6 days of rest and recuperation has actually healed a couple of other nagging problems like my knee (ha, they gave me some good drugs man, healed everything ?).
I’ll wait until I get the official all clear before I go hog wild again though.