Ok listen. I’m going to play for a while so if things get a bit weird on here, don’t panic. It’s just a phase.  Pardon me while I burst into flames, a line I borrowed from Incubus, perfectly describes my state of mind.  But as the Smashing Pumpkins sang;

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

So much for that.  Anyway, i took a roadtrip down to Cheltenham to watch the boy graduate.  How many years has it been since i walked across the stage to receive my university diploma? 25 years! Egats man. Time is a beast.

 

This rat never saw it coming. i bought into the idealism of youth, those lofty dreams of changing the world, despite the fact that the world didn’t and doesn’t need changing. It is what it is.  Always has been, and will be long after I’m gone. Somebody pour me a drink. Get the whiskey flowing.  I can’t write another dry word.

This isn’t about me. It’s about you and me and us and them and they and aliens with space probes probing the dark galaxies that God abandoned when he saw creation had gone Pete Tong in him. I’m just God’s comic stuck here to suffer in this planet. I feel like I’m responsible but I can’t do it by myself. Once there was a girl. I lost her a long time ago in the garden. On days when the wind blows just right i can smell her presence.

I am

Who else can
I be
But myself
Even when
I am
Pretending
To be
Someone else
I am
Still and only
Myself

Did I kill something in me when I let you go? When I stopped reading and following the knowledge trail until it ended in big gains, big game. I don’t remember all the names of the writer’s I read in those days. It was a time of fantasy and other worlds within worlds. I held the order in my mind. Then chaos seeped in. And I embraced her. She was bitter and sweet. Her breath smelled of ancient cigarettes and her small breasts were lost inside her cashmere sweater.

Who are you? Who do you fear you are? Who do you pretend to be to hide the Hyde within you?

Is there something wrong with me? Did I not turn out how you imagined me to be? One day there will be no more me or I and the dream will be permanent.

I would hate to get to the end of time and think, what a waste

of time.

Feeling good is good enough and I’m feeling good as good gets right now.

Soundtrack


Chow!

My friend Sarah and I met for a coffee. We were both trying to figure out where the heck to go to next with the podcast we’ve been working on for nearly 2 years. It’s a habit now, one that we want to grow. I can think of worse habits than a philosophically oriented podcast. One that helps us kind of figure out what the hell we’re doing here. And sometimes, maybe, if we’re lucky, it helps us figure out why we’re here.

My overarching conclusion was it’s time for an all out assault! Time to go all in to infinity and beyond and whatever other trite saying that means it’s time to commit in the way the pig is committed.

It was blues night on my radio show last night. If you like the blues – listen. If you don’t like the blues – listen. In conclusion, just listen. It’s a good show. If you want to listen on the move, download the Mixcloud app and follow me there. Otherwise you can listen right here:

Oh yeah and here are the visuals for the show on my Pinterest board:

 

Alright. It’s time for me to face the day. Let’s see what this bitch named Tuesday has in store for me.

See you on the socials,
Clay

After about an 18 month hiatus, The Musical Journey Show is back. I’ll be kicking off the reboot with a trip back to 1982 when all us MTV babies were discovering bands like Dexys Midnight Runners, Culture Club, Men at Work, Soft Cell, Duran Duran and others. Yet still rocking the radio with the likes of The Steve Miller Band, America, Toto, A Flock of Seagulls, Fleetwood Mac among others.

Join me Monday nights at 8:00PM on Radio Warwickshire ( www.radiowarwickshire.com ).

For the best experience listen from our main site. I’ll be in the Musical Journey Show Chat Room to expand on the tunes. You can also listen using the TuneIn app.

Check out this neat Pinterest board featuring visuals from 1982: